
Splinter Cell, Metal Gear Solid, Hitman, even ropey old 24: The Game, ropier Shadow of Rome and the ropiest Without Warning managed to get some aspects of stealth and espionage right. Try not to hit the cardboard set, it'll all come crashing down. Will I be dangling precariously above a motion-sensitive security device that will unleash nuclear winter if I so much as brush a nose hair up against it? No, but I can put some glasses on to see coloured lasers if I want to. Will I make it to the final hurdle only to be thwarted by a quick-witted guard or my own last-minute drop in concentration? To be honest, I could skip past whistling Zip-A-Dee-Doo-Dah, and so long as I'm not in the guard's 45-degree cone of vision no-one would notice. If it were this easy in real life I wouldn't have spent three months in borstal. That's actually an objective on the first level walk through a corridor and out of the main prison doors. In reality it's as dull as walking through three doors. It's supposedly a game of stealth and cunning, immaculate timing and well executed cons. Is this it? Three controllable characters, all highly skilled espionage agents, and they're politely leaving doors open and boring guards to death with mindless banter? How many icons do you want on one screen? Pick-pocketing keys and twisting a door handle at the same time as your colleague. Switching off lights so someone else can sneak through the dark. That's the excitement right there - opening doors for other people. Or maybe you need someone to hold their finger on a button in order to keep a roof hatch open while another member of this elite gang nips through it. What it actually amounts to is distracting a guard by sending one of the team to chat him up, while another slips past unnoticed. Breaking out of prison, swapping diamonds, stealing blueprints and leaving nothing but an expression of bewilderment on the faces of their foes.

Objectives are completed through the interaction of the three team members as they pull off supposedly slick jobs using their signature skills.

The hook of The Plan is that there are three playable characters during a mission, all on screen in their own little window, and each is controllable whenever the player sees fit. Unfortunately, they seem to have been trained by the Chuckle Brothers, their disguises consist of joke shop glasses complete with plastic nose and a flapping moustache, and their most hi-tech gadget is a Gizmondo. The Plan features seven specialist agents all working together to pull off the most audacious heist the criminal underworld has ever seen. It's a life of cocktail dresses and poison lipstick, deep cover and hoodwinking disguises, hi-tech gadgets and quick reflexes. Just ask Bond, Bourne, Fisher, Hunt or any of the teams from Hustle, 24 or Spooks. Espionage careers are glamorous, dangerous and thrilling pursuits.
